7 of 30

What is your dream job, and why?

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This has changed a bit. 

I actually have two.

1. Country Singer. But like real country. Not the fake crap that is on the radio right now. Real gritty, hurtin', twangy, country. Old school.

2. Speaker. Like, speak to youth about loving yourself and being loved. Let them know that high school does not matter. Make a difference in one life. Tell them drugs are bad.

But, I am a mom. And honestly, I can think of nothing better.

AZ

I love AZ.

So much.

And so did Navy.

Ahhhhhh......

Arizona.

Heat

Family

Sonic

Food

Swinging

Laughing

Friends

House Hunting.

Update

Miss Navy.

Four months

15 pounds (8 of it in her cheeks)

Laughs and giggles

Rolls over

Has more clothes than she should

Will start solid foods in two weeks

Getting ready for her first road trip

Loves looking at herself in the mirror

Has a kickin bald spot

Will have full on conversations in her crib with her cow and bear

Her favorite song is (sittin on) The Dock of the Bay

We are starting to see a little Parker in her

Still sweet

6 of 30

What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced

ok this picture. see those two girls to the right of me. i love them with all my heart. they are my sisters. see the one in the middle.....she is my heart. oh and....i am so HIGH in this picture. it was taken one week before i went to jail. FYI.

 In my 35 years I have experienced a lot of hard things.

Addiction

Jail

Physical abuse

Divorce

Divorce of my parents

Almost losing my sweet Navy

I have learned so much from them. They have made me better. 

One I could have done without is almost losing that sweet girl in the middle up there. 

I am so lucky to have adopted 4 sisters and 1 brother 5 years ago. I love them all like they are my own, and year by year I love them more.

But for some reason that one up there just has a special place in my heart. 

Perhaps it is because when I got sober we were the only two single.

Perhaps it is because when I got sober her and I just bonded.

I don't know but whatever it is...I love her like my own flesh and blood. 

She was in a car accident almost two years ago that almost took her from us. I remember the dreaded phone call from my dad. We were at dinner and I just broke down. I remember just praying and praying that she would be ok. I was physically ill. I was an emotional wreck. 

She pulled through. She is amazing and now that sweet little girl has a sweet husband and sweet baby boy. 

I cannot wait to meet him this week. 

5 of 30

What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now

this is one of those pure bliss moments. here is my bestie, future husband, and i on our way to california. our first stop was two days in disneyland. it was fab. 

1. The excitement of going to AZ!!!! I cannot wait to see my family and meet all the sweet littles that have been born. I cannot wait for them to meet Navy. I cannot wait for the heat. I cannot wait for lunch with friends. I just cannot wait.

2. My sweet baby girl. She makes me happy every day.

3. My husband...I have a good husband. 

4. The hope that ONE day my bangs will be grown out because right now is HELL.

5. The Atonement

What makes you happy?

4 of 30

List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could

I don't have any pics of when I was 16, so here is one when I played a 16 year old.

10. Quit matching your scrunchie to your outfits...better yet quit wearing scrunchies.

9. Contempo Casuals will not be cool in the future. Invest more in J.Crew.

8. Read your scriptures every day. Gain your testimony NOW.

7. You do not need to get married young. Your perfect man will wait until you are 32.

6. HE IS NOT WORTH IT. YOU ARE BETTER THAN HIM. 

5. Stick closer to your friend Carrie through the years.

4. Don't do drugs

3. You are a beautiful daughter of God. Remember that.

2. Choose your friends wisely, your bestie will wait for you.

1. When you die your hair platinum blonde and then you go to jail...you have 6 months worth of white trash grow out. Stick to dark. Quit trying to change who you are and realize you are great.

What would YOU tell your 16 year old self?

3 of 30

Describe your relationship with your parents

My mom.

My mom lives in North Salt Lake, so like 5 minutes away.

We see her at least 3 times a week (she really loves Navy...but who doesn't).

Our relationship has had it's ups and downs. She had to deal with most of this. In fact my sweet mom was the one who called the cops and turned me in. All in the name of saving me. And if you are a mom, you can imagine the pain she went through as the North Salt Lake police department put her little girl in handcuffs and hauled her off to jail. 

She has been through a lot in her life and has always stayed true to the gospel. She is such an example of strength in testimony. She never gave up on me.

I feel like our relationship gets better every day. She trusts me and loves me and I know this. And for a long time I didn't. I am grateful for her and the things she has done for me. 

My dad.

I don't know if you can tell by this picture...but I look exactly like him.

And what is funny is I act like him too.

I have noticed lately that certain words I use...certain phrasings....the way I react....are my dad.

He and my bonus mom live in Gilbert, AZ but we try to see them at least twice a year.

As of late, my dad and I have had a great relationship. We are pretty similar so that could help. 

Whenever I have a gospel question, I go to my dad. He is so well versed in the scriptures and church history that any question I have he can usually answer. We tend to be interested in the same things...so we can have great conversations on U.S. history, military history, and shoes (that last part is not true).

He is the ultimate host, so when we go to AZ we are treated like royalty by my dad and his sweet wife. 

I love them both so very much

side note: i know my bonus mom did not raise me, but she has been a mother to me in the short time they have been married. she married my dad when i was a drug addict and went through all the crap of rehab, relapse, and jail. in that time she has always loved me and looked out for me and treated me like one of her own. she is an outstanding person and a true example of christ-like love.

So how about you.....how is YOUR relationship with your parents?

2 of 30

Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears

It was easier to think of miss's fears than mine.

Birds

Holes

Naked

But here we go...

1. Unfinished basements. I hate them. They creep me out. Before all the town homes in our complex were sold you could see into a couple. And one had an unfinished basement. It made my hands hurt...even in broad daylight. I have no idea where this came from.

2. Haunted houses. HATTTTTTE them. I will sit through any scary movie, but ask me to go to a haunted house and the answer is no. I trace this back to the first haunted house I went to. I had just bought a new Abercrombie sweater (look it was 1998...I went through a phase). The haunted house scared me so much I ran and ran and snagged my sweater...causing there to be a big hole in said sweater. Stupid haunted houses.

3. Losing anyone I love. When I was a freshman in high school my uncle was killed in a freak accident. From that day on I am so afraid of losing people I love. Like I will call you 3094857398457 times if you are not to my house when you say you will be. Not because you are late, but because I am afraid you have died. 

4. Carni folk. Enough said.

So...what are your fears? 

Thirty things in Thirty days

While browsing Pinterest I came upon this on the most darling blog...

click image to go to page

I am going to do this.

Thirty things in Thirty days on my blog. 

Starting today....

List 20 random facts about myself.

1. I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints

2. I was born an only child but I now have 7 sisters and 3 brothers

3. One of those sisters is my bestie

4. I hate the word bestie but now it is habit to use it

5. I have tried out for American Idol

6. I can play the guitar

7. I love football, like I really love it. I don't just fake it to get a boy to like me.

8. I have a bit of OCD. Like closet doors need to be closed or I itch

9. No matter how long I live in Utah my home will always be Arizona

10. The best chicken nuggets I have EVER had were in jail

11. I have three second cousins whom I consider nieces and nephews

12. I am super blunt

13. I am slowly but surely losing the baby weight. Hopefully I will be back to normal in 2078

13. My favorite movie is All About Eve

14. I will forever think that Buffy the Vampire Slayer was the best show that ever was

15. I drive a 2011 black Mazda CR-7 with the plates SWEETJ

16. I can sing most any sitcom theme song

17. I think John C. Reilly is super attractive

18. I am surrounded by really great friends

19. I do not wear deodorant....never have...I don't sweat

20. I have an issue with heights.....even if I think of high places...my hands hurt. 

How about you? What is one random fact about you?

Weekendness

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This weekend Ed and I took our annual April conference trip to Logan.

We ate delicious food and delightful cupcakes.

But the BEST part about it was conference.

I LOVE General Conference. It renews me and makes me want to be better.

It was a slap upside the head reminding me of things I need to work on. 

President Uchtdorf and Elder Holland especially.

Reminders to be kind, charitable, and have Christ-like love for those around me.

I will do it. I can do it.

I will..."be kind and be grateful God is kind".

God was so kind to me...he has helped me turn my life around and has given me the incredible life I have now.

I know this gospel is true.

And I am grateful for the great men that lead us.