Christmas Tag

1. Have you started your Christmas shopping?

Yes. In fact I am finished.

2. Tell me about one of your special traditions.

Ummm....lets see. Well every year I get a new ornament to put on the tree. I have always felt like a choreographed tree is sterile. My tree is full of hodge podge ornaments that mean something to me.

3. When do you put up your tree?

 

Beginning of December

4. Are you a Black Friday shopper?

 

No because I think that is racist

  

5. Do you travel at Christmas or stay home?

 

Well I am guessing that now it is a trade off. You know one year here and the next in AZ

  

6. What is your funniest Christmas memory?

 

One year my dad gave me a hubcap. I had lost mine off my car because I am a terrible driver. Anyways...I was pretty irritated but on the back was money for clothes, so it turned out OK. K now for the funny part. I used that money to buy cream Guess jeans and a blue and cream striped Guess shirt with matching scrunchee and argyle Vans.

 

 

7. What is your favorite Christmas movie of all time?

 

National Lampoons Christmas Vacation. Now that is a family tradition.

8. Do you do your own Christmas baking? What's your favorite treat?

 

What is this word baking? I love sugar cookies that my mom makes

9. Fake or real tree?

 

Melissa, the word spider-sac is awful.

Fake

 

10. What day does the actual panic set in to get it all done?

 

Uh I am in wedding panic...Christmas has nothing on that

11. Are you still wrapping presents on Christmas Eve?

 

Hell no....I am always done before then

12. What is your favorite family fun time at Christmas?

 

Uh....like all of Christmas? Its all good family fun time.

  

13. What Christmas Craft do you like the best?

 

What in the hell are crafts.

14. Christmas music? Yes or no, and if yes, what is your favorite song?

NO. But does that surprise anyone? I love Christmas Hymns though. Far Far Away on Judea's Plane.

  

15. When do you plan to finish all your shopping?

 

Done and Done

I tag Auby, Lori, Robin and Hailey

Gunpowder and Lead

I am a Democrat

But this girl makes me want a gun

As most know I was in a pretty abusive relationship......yeah....pretty abusive

Miranda Lambert has a song called Gunpowder and Lead

I damn near felt Republican as this little girl sang about blowing away her abusive husband/boyfriend

Seriously...

Auby

It was Auby's birthday last week.

I am the worst friend ever because her birthday list is a week late.

But here it is none the less

28 Great Things About Auby

1. She is the funniest person, she makes me laugh on a daily basis. And I mean out loud laugh
2. She has a devil may care attitude. She is who she is so suck it girls who have no idea who she is and were on a swim team
3. She has fantastic style
4. She is a glorious cook (she made me like mac and cheese)
5. She is up for anything
6. She held my hand during Paranormal Activity
7. She loves TV. I mean if you are my friend you gotta love TV
8. She is like Oprah
9. She has an unshakeable testimony
10. She is 100% loyal
11. She will visit you if you go to jail (she has promised me that)
12. She is up on her pop culture
13. She went to theatre camp
14. She is willing to offer an honest opinion
15. She loves kids (real kids)
16. She is open minded politically
17. She knows me and what to say to make me feel better in any sitch
18. She hates the word bestie
19. She is good at her job
20. She is great under pressure
21. She is a great teacher
22. If you are crying in sacrament she will go get you Kleenex
23. Best Maid of Honor EVER
24. Lets you borrow her belts
25. She has great hair
26. She loves the Chargers
27. She is a brave little toaster
28. She makes the best french toast (seriously...like...if your reading this can you make some)

Happy Birthday Miss!!!!!!

Sorry The Box was lame (giggle)

Parkers

*sigh*

Ok I have a confession to make. I am pretty soft hearted. I mean I get my feelings hurt, I cry at movies, I cry at commercials, and I cry when Ed does not turn around and go back to look for the stray dog who might get hit if we don't save it.

Because of this I am a democrat. Oh and I attach to people. See I like belonging to things, I like having a core group of friends that I know I can count on, I like families.

I always worried that I would not be real accepted by a family. I had a bad experience. And I am loud and opiniated and I dress in really bright colors. Not to mention the fact that I have serious baggage. I had just kind of given up on the fact that I would find a good family that would like me.

Well I am still loud and I think a bit too much too take sometimes. Especially when I am in my element. But, I think I am liked. I think that they are OK with me marrying Ed. They are great people.

I need to quit typing because I am crying

Bridesmaids

Two weeks ago, I had all my bridesmaids together


I took this picture. As I looked at it today I honestly got a bit choked up (but Aubs can attest to the fact that the tears are nothing new). These are girls that will be part of my life forever. I remembered how I lost touch with my bridesmaids last time because of choices I made.


That will not happen again


I mean all of them....are part of my life forever

Catherine (Little Miss)
Is my little sister who is not blood related. I have the greatest time with her. We are more than a decade apart in age, but come on, raise your hand if you think I act 32. If you raised your hand you do not know me or you are Jared and you are surprised I am not 38. This girl remembers me in all family things, leads me by her great example and is the funniest 19 year old I have ever known. She is down to earth and I am so excited to have her in my family forever. And is she not the prettiest thing you have ever seen?


Auby (Miss)
My well deserved Maid of Honor. She has truly been the best friend I have ever had. She has been completely selfless when it comes to me. I am amazed at the things she does for me. She knows me better than about anyone knows me. We like the same things, we laugh at the same things, we don’t really have the same taste in music but we make it work. She is single handedly planning my wedding. I mean she lets me think I made the decision but if it is a bad one she gently leads me on another path. I am grateful everyday for her. She was just as proud as my mom was when I went to the temple. She is the friend every girl wishes she had and when you have her...she never leaves. She has never ending loyalty. And she is pretty.


Julie
 My aunt. The closest thing I had to a sister growing up. We are not far apart in age and she was my hero growing up. I wanted to dress like Julie, listen to the music Julie listened to, do my hair like Julie, and hang out with Julie and all her cool friends. She has been a great example of strength and courage and has raised the two best boys ever. I could not imagine having a wedding and not including her. She is my surrogate big sister. The one who was never afraid to tell me I was going down the wrong path. The one who stood beside me through thick and thin. I love her. And yep...she is pretty too.


Shauna
Ed's older sister...that I am older than....that made me sad. I have been amazed since I met her how together Shauna is. She is primary president, a mom to two great kids, is a Realtor, and finds the time to help with anything. And she does it all with a calm demeanor that makes me seem like a hurricane. I am an only child and so loyalty to siblings is new to me. Shauna is loyal to her family. And it is humbling to watch. And oh my gosh...she is pretty too!!!!


Anita (for some reason I have always called her Nita...probably because her name was too long for me to say or I am lazy) 
Ed's younger sister that is more responsible than me....buh....I am under qualified for this family. Nita is one of the most service oriented people I have ever met. She is always asking if she can do anything for anyone. I am amazed by that. She is also the only girl I have ever me that has been to Lowes more than 3 times a year. I am pretty sure she could build me a house if I asked her to. Nita is loyal to her family too. Something I find comforting. And...You guessed it...she is pretty.


Moral of the story

You have to be pretty to be my bridesmaid

Headbands

I love headbands.

I love bright feather headbands.

I love headbands that do not hurt my head.

About 3 months ago (or more) Auby and I went to Craft Lake City. A craft fair here in Salt Lake. On this blessed day I discovered the headbands of my dreams.

I walked up to the table in awe. Everything I have ever wanted in a headband was there. I almost started crying. I bought two.

I then got engaged. I emailed Anne Michelle and asked if she could make my bridal party headbands. And she did. And they are amazing.

So....if you love headbands, do yourself a favor and check this girl out.

And if you want to buy me one for telling you about it.....you can

Favorite Friday - Kitty Pappas

This is a Bountiful landmark.

I mean the sign itself is CLASSIC!

The ambiance is to DIE for.

The food...well not that great...but good

The cake...delicious

George the waiter...words can not describe

(everytime he brings us a drink he throws a straw at us and says "here suck on these ladies")

The Jukebox....filled with songs about pot and The Grateful Dead

In short. It is awesome.

Thank you Brooke for introducing me.

And so Kitty's this Friday is dedicated to you

and your lemons that smell of vodka

Where Actors Go To Die

Today I went to the movies.

I saw this movie poster.

I laughed out loud.

The cast list on this movie......wow....

Chris Brown - Known best for beating Rhianna

Paul Walker - Known for caving and doing another "Fast and the Furious" because times are tough

Hayden Christensen - Known for ruining "Star Wars"

Matt Dillon - Known for kind of making a comeback then doing "You, Me and Dupree". Oh and he was in "Wild Things" (don't lie I know you have seen it)

Johnathon Schaech - Known for "That Thing You Do" and then somehow landing Christina Applegate...only to lose her

TI - I mean do I even need to say anything

Michael Ealy - Of "Barbershop" and "Barbershop 2"

Everyone of these fine thespians got a call from their agent that went a bit like this

"uh hey there guy. look there is this movie and you would be perfect for the part. i mean it is really your last shot. if this fails...well...we are going to have to settle for that pilot on the wb

I mean this movie will be a disaster.

All it is missing is Andy Dick.

Thankful Thursday

Thank you for always commenting

even if they are snotty and sarcastic

Thank you for giving up half your Saturday

i would be lost.....

Thank you for my new toy

hee hee I love you

Thank you for always making a delicious Sunday dinner

and for always letting me come

Thank you for taking me to get my passport

see how much fun it is when you read my blog

Thank you for the party

it was super fun even if i was sick

Thank you for the delicious Mac and Cheese

is there anything you can't do?

Thank you for being patient with me even when I get cranky

you are the bast male on the planet

Thank you for calling me during testimony meeting

the san diego super chargers song never sounded so good

Thank you for coming over on Sunday

i missed you guys

Thank you for standing up for me to girls who don't even know me

oh and for kittys

Thank you for emailing me

i really do want to get together when we come to az

Thank you World Series

for being over...oh tv how i have missed you

Thank you Sweet D

for providing me with laughs every thursday

Thank you for beating Oakland

keep it up

Thank you for losing to Baltimore

keep it up

Thank you for seeing that it was not all my fault

not even a little

Thank you for the facebook email

it made my day

Engagements

A day of......

Early morning hair
4 Diet Cokes before noon
Walking into Nordstrom with no makeup
Having my nails done...ruining them...having them done again
Splitting my pants
Rain

All for......

Perfection
by
The most wonderful photographer EVER


They are almost ready

Dreams of a Child

"When I grow up I am going to have enough money to fill an entire trunk with candy"

check

Dreams of an Adult

"When I get married I am wearing 5 inch designer heels no matter the cost"

check

Aren't you all dying to see them?
I can tell you this...they are not white.

Magic Powers

You all have seen her on my blog.

But I have news about Miss.

She has a super secret power that has actually been fortold.

Miss...can guess the songs that come on the crappy easy listening stations before they even play.

I am not kidding. I have seen it happen like 54 times. It is creepy.

I mean for real.....

"Hey Jen, I bet they play This Kiss next"

This Kiss...plays next

"Hey Jen, I bet they play that crappy Sixpence None The Richer song everyone loved like 10 years ago"

Kiss me...plays next

"Hey Jen, I bet they play a song that sounds exactly like all the rest of the songs this artist sings because that is all she knows how to write"

Taylor Swift...plays next

Use your powers for good Miss and next time request some Phil Collins

Favorite Friday - It's a 10

Who here wants perfect, fabulous, fantastic hair?

Well I am here to answer your prayers and let you in on the greatest hair product ever.

Let me tell you about my hair.

It is ugly.
It is flat.
It is stick straight.
It is dry.

I hate my hair.


This miracle product has redeemed my hair with shiny, fabulous, goodness.

It does ten things, I do not remember what. So I composed my OWN ten

1. It makes my hair manageable
2. It protects my hair
3. It makes my hair shiny
4. It stops fly-aways
5. It smells g-g-g-good
6. It hydrates my hair
7. It makes me stop looking like Kim from Atlanta Housewives
8. It gives me that hair model look when I turn my head
9. It takes the annoying wave out of my hair
10. It promotes world peace

And so It's a 10 this Friday is dedicated to you.....and your sassy pink top

Thankful Thursday

Thank you for commenting on my blog

that goes out to everyone except for you because you did not

Thank you for going to Sonic TWICE in an hour period

i don't know why I love that chicken basket

Thank you country gravy

because you are why i like the chicken basket

Thank you for my country roots

because that is why i like country gravy

Thank you for picking me up IN THE SNOW and driving all around IN THE SNOW

seriously...we hate utah...except for the great clothes and such

Thank you for the MOST AMAZING ENGAGEMENTS EVER

they are going to look so awesome

Thank you for letting us borrow your glass candy dishes

you don't read this but thanks just the same

Thank you for reminding me to invite Glenn Beck to my wedding

you even supplied his address

although i could have just sent it to hell and he would have gotten it eventually

Thank you for coming on the 14th

its gonna be tight y'all

Thank you for going to the store for me

*sigh* i love you

Thank you for getting the timeshare

it is going to be tight y'all

Thank you for going to TJ Max and getting the shoes for cheaper

i am excited to marry into a great family

Thank you for making my passport appointment

maybe MY MOTHER could start reading my blog

Thank you for Sunday

it was worth it

Thank you for chilling with us while we waited for our food

that was crazy right? remind your husband we did not plan it

Thank you for beating Kansas City

freak...i would have razored myself

Thank you for sending me the BEP and Slash video

it was awesome

Thank you for coming to my door and sticking a business card to it and ruining my Wednesday

i can not stand ANY of you

Thank you for supporting my cousins business

even though you did not know it was her

Thank you for always reminding me that I am nothing without you

it is a lesson a learn daily

Thank you for always inviting me to go bowling

one day i may say yes

Girls

Hate me.

I have really tried to understand why.

I mean could it be because

I like football (actually love it more than air)

I like boy TV shows (Sunny, Family Guy, South Park, Adult Swim)

I like action and horror movies and despise 95% of chick flicks

I hate the Twilight movies

I am a music snob

I like Star Wars and Star Trek and Video Games

I like 80's Hair Metal

I despise Grey's Anatomy

I love college basketball

I love crowded venues and live music

Because if you really knew me you would know

I love shopping

I love Nordstrom and Anthropologie

I like getting my hair done

I like getting my nails done

I know my pop culture references

I like designer jeans

I giggle

I have celebrity crushes (mind you it is Stephen Colbert but still)

I love to read

I have someone I call a bestie

Honestly, I think what it comes down to is I am pretty pragmatic and highly opinionated. I mean I don't mind when other girls like things I don't...but on certain things...I tend to say to much.

Oh and what can I say. Only child. So I was all girl for my mom and all boy for my dad. So if I happen to get along better with boys...well...they don't treat me the way girls usually do.

I do have some really great girlfriends, old and new, so really I don't care...so much. I just think it is semi-interesting and semi-hilarious.

Maybe it is because I am a Democrat

Favorite Friday - The Perfect Engagement

Friday October 9th 2009.

I have been told to be ready at 5:30 so that we can meet our friends at Ed's house. We are going to go to dinner and then to to see A Chorus Line

side note: I had been pretty cranky this week. I told Auby I was going to get a ticket for A Chorus Line and go with her and Brit on Saturday. That night Ed told me we were going to see A Chorus Line. Sneaky Ed.


Anyway so our friends Cody and Ruthie picked us up to go to dinner and such

side note: The night before I argued with Ed on how we needed to meet them because they were coming from Lehi. He told me they wanted to pick us up. Sneaky Ed.

We are driving and having great conversation when I realize...we are going to the airport.


side note: I asked Ed where we were going and he said that Cody was just messing around. Knowing Cody I believed him..for like a minute. Sneaky Ed.

It did not take long to realize...we were stopping at the airport. Ed got out, Cody got out, Ruthie got out. I stayed firmly put saying "what in the hell is going on?" Ed says "Jen get out, we are going on a trip". I get out and Cody hands me an overnight bag. I say "that is Aubs bag".

side note: Auby packed me the most amazing surprise overnight bag. Seriously. If you ever go on a surprise vacation..make sure she packs your bag. Complete with 30z liquid bottles and Dior Moisturizer. I mean PERFECTION. Opening it that night was like Christmas. Sneaky Auby.

I followed Ed into the airport and soon learned we were jetting off to California. We boarded the airplane and I knew right away this was going to be amazing when I plugged my earphones into the media player on the plane and I could listen to "Circus" by Ms. Spears.

That next day, well we went to Disneyland. We rode rides until about noon and then Ed wanted a Churro. So we got Churros. Ed asked me where the bathroom was. I told him. He made small talk and then said...I will be right back.

side note: Our friends Cody and Ruthie flew out after we did to help Ed "deliver" the ring. Sneaky Cody and Ruthie

Next think I knew Ed was in front of the castle he says "Jen come here I found someone to take our picture" So I got up...walked over...and then I saw it. A cupcake with the most beautiful ring ever on top. Ed got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. I said yes...and the rest is a blur of hugs and clapping and kisses and frosting.

And so perfect engagement this Friday is dedicated to you........

And Happily Ever After

Thankful Thursday

Thank you for bringing me Mochi ice cream
i love you so so so so much

Thank you for making me the most beautiful wedding dress
i know it will be amazing

Thank you for driving me to the end of the earth
a bean burrito is not a proper thank you

Thank you for making Hannah Montana your ring tone
because now i will call you all the time and laugh

Thank you for going to Kitty's with me
i can really only swear like a sailor around you

Thank you for the cobbler
insert sassy remark about your co-worker

Thank you for the best hour of the week
mad men i adore you

Thank you for fabulous pillows I can't have yet
hey everybody i am registering at target

Thank you for carving pumpkins with us
i am so excited to spend many weekend nights trying to keep your husband off of mine

Thank you for lower calorie soup
i don't know how you did it V8...but you did

Thank you for pepper jack snack cheese
again we are registering at target

Thank you for laughing when I throw fits
again...i love you

Thank you for reminding me why football season makes me suicidal
*sigh* chargers

BLECH

I really could go on and on and on and on about how I despise these movies

But today I focus on reason number(s) 2,598 and 1,589

Jasper

Look at that kid. I am serious when I tell you I am more afraid of him molesting my children than eating them. Like, I am expecting Chris Hansen to make a guest appearance in this film asking Jasper why he was chatting with a 13 year old girl online and why he has a six pack of wine coolers.

The Soundtrack

OK, most know that I am a music snob. I admit it. But today iTunes called this soundtrack...wait for it...glorious. REALLY???? Glorious???? Wow. Big words for a soundtrack that featured like 679 Muse songs on the first one. I mean...I have seen the track list on this and I guess they are right. It is a glorious pile of crap. Oh but wait....if I buy it on iTunes there is a bonus track. My gut feeling is that it is a GLORIOUS tune from Nickleback.

Once again I also feel I must admit I will see it. Again, mostly for the mocking

I Promise

To be more of a faithful blogger

I mean I guess I don't know if anyone cares...but...I guess I will do it for myself and my 3 readers.

I also promise to blog about

The perfect engagement

Music

Tardy for the Party

Friends

Shoes

Dresses

Wedding Stuff

Football

Horoscopes

Farm Animals

Kids

Family

Spock

and various other things

Get ready world (I mean the 3 people reading this)

HERE I COME

Favorite Friday - Passive Aggressive Facebook Fights

I have been in them.

I have instigated them.

I am amazed every time I see one.

I vow never ever ever again to do it. From now on I will confront you head on....because that's the way I like it anyway.

But it is kind of fun to read them....and even funner when you realize..."oh snap that person just called me out on a website", or "that person is angry because I have an opinion" or "your picture of your family in the Bahamas last year has really made me angry".

And so passive aggressive facebook fights this day is dedicated to you in all your dysfunctional glory.

(and I think that I have positive status updates)

Can't Find A Better Man

I went to Pearl Jam on Monday

It was good

It got me to thinking...I was a freshman in high school when Ten came out. That means when Eddie said that some people brought their kids to the concert...well that could have been me.

Then I thought about my 6 favorite bands and if I would bring my kids to their concerts. In my head I thought.....

Oasis

(ummm yeah maybe...I mean I can't now because they are broken up for the 47th time...but yeah, as long as Liam was not drunk....so no I would not take them)

The Who

(Uh yeah totally...for the two that are alive I guess. If Keith was still alive, yeah probably not)

Social Distortion

(definitely no)

Roger Clyne and The Peacemakers

(Yes except they always play venues 21 and over so no)

Iron Maiden

(I never want to explain devil worship to my kids)

Guns N Roses

(yes yes and yes because if they ever got back together that would be worth hearing the F bomb)

You know and then there is....

Ms. Spears

(no)

Allison Moorer

(21 and over and they should choose there own political views and not have their mother and a singer telling them who to vote for)

Morrissey

(yeah...except I do not want to explain what a-sexual is)

Poison

(By that time they will know Poison because of Rock of Love 256...so yeah)

SO.....*sigh* in conclusion. I will be seeing Disney on Ice for the rest of my life.

(side note: I would take a dog to everyone of the above mentioned concerts...so....)

Thankful Thursday

I know I usually put a list of things here. But today it is one

(it was amazing....better than expected)

Favorite Friday - Boe

Look at that face

Is she not the most beautiful little girl you have ever seen?

It is a well known fact that only recently have I started...well.....liking kids. I am an only child and I grew up with adults. Kids made me nervous...like they could see into my soul.

So I stuck with puppies

But lately, with the help of this precious girl, and these precious ones, and this little chunk, and the cutie pictured above, I find myself saying...."I want one".

Tiny Miss here (not to be confused with Miss and Little Miss) is the lovliest, smartest, funniest, cuddliest little love ever. I am so lucky I get to be her second cousin (seriously..am I even realted to her? Second cousin, FAVORITE second cousin)

So Boe this Friday is dedicated to you. I will make sure you go to Disney World.

What is your definition?

I find it interesting sometimes how skewed peoples perspective of themselves are. I mean some people think that they have a base of kindness and love when in fact inside they seethe with anger and fear. Because of this they hold others to their skewed view. Expecting things that they themselves do not do.

So what is you definition of social graces and kindness? Is it please and thank you? Is the yes sir yes ma'am? Is it mother may I? Is it boldly expressing your opinion on things that mean the world to you? Is it hiding behind hurtful words in the wee hours of the morning? Is it yelling at people behind a closed door? Is it being passive-aggressive? Is it looking down on others while buzzing on an intercom? Is it ignoring people, is it holding a grudge, is it expecting things of people that are not possible? And most importantly......is it treating people with a pseudo respect all the while thinking you are better because your thoughts matter and the rest of the world is not smart enough or open minded enough to understand.

I think it is interesting that every person has a different opinion of kindness. I have been treated cruelly by those who think they are generally nice and polite. I have also done the same. Been cruel and hurtful....all while touting that I try my hardest to be nice. But I have NEVER felt that I was the only nice girl and others were cruel because they were different or handled things in a different manner.

I only hope I can cement my definition and live by it.

Thankful

Thank you for making cupcakes

(I literally do not know what I would do in this life without you)

Thank you for picking me up

(I really wanted to see him and you helped me)

Thank you for emailing me

(it made my week)

Thank you for not killing my dog

(just love on him)

Thank you for Mad Men

(and I thought you were only good for old movies)

Thank you for the tickets

(miss and I had a blast)

Thank you for coming over last night

(It was soooo great to see you)

Thank you for Taco Soup

(something that I can make....YAY!!!!)

Thank you for lunch

(and bonus it was half off thanks to meth)

Thank you for texting me that hilarious joke

(it made me laugh out loud)

Thank you for texting and asking about Ed

(you are the best pseudo mom ever)

Thank you for helping Ed with his house

(you have done a great job, even with the stress of it all)

Favorite Friday - Waiting for Guffman

Ok...give me a minute to recover because even the movie cover makes me laugh

This movie is pure genius. Some may argue that Spinal Tap is better...but it is not

If you follow Christopher Guest films then you know...this is his best

I will give you five reasons:

Parker Posey

The main characters name is Corky

It's a mockumentary

The best use of swear words I have ever seen

Corky wears his pants backwards like Kriss Kross

Seriously...I own it. You can borrow it.

And so Waiting for Guffman today is dedicated to you

(and your ass face)

Thankful

Thank you for taking care of Ed

(even though your his mom)

Thank you for having STNG

(I went EVERYWHERE)

Thank you for taking me everywhere

(it was like old times and totally fun)

Thank you for coming out of retirement again

(that was sarcasm....stupid Brett Favre)

Thank you for eating Volcano Nachos with me

(once a year)

Thank you Mochi Ice Cream

(some days you save me)

Thank you for getting me kleenex in sacrament meeting

(seriously...that was super fast)

Thank you for sending me the text about changing your wallpaper

(It made my entire day)

Thank you for suggesting Imaginationland

(I laughed until I peed)

Thank you for commenting on my blog

(even though we have never met)

Mad Men

Ummm...can anyone say brilliant?

I mean, WOW. Thank you AMC.

This little sparkling gem started it's third season on Sunday...I mean...where have I been?

Well no fear I am on it now.

I have looked up all the info on Wikipedia and Miss and I are nearly experts now.

(Don, Peggy, Pete, Sterling and Joan...yeah we know them)

So Peeps set your DVR's Mad Men

(Oh and for all my Buffy and Angel fans.....one of the main characters is Connor from Angel. BONUS)

A Letter

Dear Mono,

I really do not like you. You have taken the health of the one I love, you have ruined my plans for the next three months, AND you have made it so I can not kiss Ed for like 3 months. I looked you up on Web MD and you are a bugger. Like, remember how you are not supposed to make adults over 21 sick? Remember how you are supposed to like NOT make a 28 year old man seriously ill?

And what is with this 3 month recovery? I mean mono should be called like "mini cancer" or something. Because you never really lose it, it just goes into remission. BUH!!!! Leave my boyfriend alone.

But..I did just have the best Monday with Miss.....but that is all I will give you.

All I can say is one day you will get yours.

Jen

Favorite Friday - MAC Red Lipstick

I love red lipstick

It makes me feel...girly and sultry and just a little trashy

Miss (of course) found the best red lipstick in a land that I NEVER enter....

The MAC makeup counter

(Seriously, I went with her one day. I bought what I needed from Dior and then braved the isles of tweens, Utah County moms, loud terrible music, and sales girls with too much or thier own product on their face. Miss made me go. Said it was good for me.)

AND WAS IT

Found this perfect little gem of a color MAC Red

And so today is dedicated to you....MAC Red Lipstick

(Sorry Ed melted you in the back of the Jetta)

Thankful

Thank you for planning a dinner for me tonight

(it was totally awesome)

Thank you for coming last night even with the swine flu

(i love you)

Thank you for driving me everywhere

(this could be for tons of people)

Thank you for making me laugh

(now come home)

Thank you for being my friend when I did not have anyone

(i still worry about you)

Thank you for dealing with my dad's addict child

(i feel bad you married into that)

Thank you for being the best little sister ever

(even if we are not related)

Thank you for always standing by me and telling me to get my s&*t together

(but what are cousins for if not that)

Thank you for sharing your family with me

(i cant wait to see you next weekend)

Thank you for making the perfect moisturizer

(i will never stray)

Thank you for making the perfect cardi

(again, i will never stray)

Thank you for debating with me

(you are my favorite person who carries a gun)

Thank you for introducing me to "cheap class"

(i heart kitty's)

Sweet Hell.....

Even fetching Peter Pan got married........

WHAT THE!!!!!!

This, my friends, is a babydoll that cries when it is hungry and will only stop crying when....wait for it....it is breast fed.

Thats right. A special nursing bra comes with this baby. So you strap it on your young ones and watch as the baby "eats" while making sucking and slurping sounds.

THIS IS NOT A JOKE

....but it did make me laugh.

Favorite Friday - The day when THIS goes away

Scarves with t-shirts and tank tops.

Lovingly referred to in the fashion industry as "summer scarves"

Really?

That is like a "summer ski jacket" or a "winter bikini". Dumb.

I can not stand the look, and I have tried. I even tried one on. Nope I think it is tool like is every way shape and fashion.

I mean.....could you not find a neckalce that day? Do you suffer from a cold neck but everything else is hot? I suggest anyone who has to wear a scarf in the summer eat a sandwich and gain some body weight.

And so "summer scarf" this day is dedicated to the day you go away. But then...

what will Lindsay Lohan wear?

I had a friend

Who went crazy.

It was a slow decent...no one really saw it coming.....

But decend this person did and it is difficult to watch.

Favorite Friday - Poem

This poem changed me.

I hope it does the same for you.

Favorite Friday - Miss

This is Miss.

She is fantastic.

Miss is best at.....

shopping

planning make believe events

going to amusement parks

going to Maverick on Saturday and getting nachos

giggling in church

doing community service

being loyal to her friends

putting together an outfit

trying new things

going to the broadway

2 for Che

watching any show on A&E or Bravo

having a grown up job

making me smile on days I did not think I could

making cupcakes

speaking her mind

Aug.15th miss

This day is dedicated to you

Who is the ugliest girl on TV?

I mean inside and out.

If you do not watch NYC Prep....I am sorry...because you should.

If you do....you know what I am talking about.

If I have to hear one more time "kids in NYC grow up a lot faster than other kids" I will punch the screen.

Jared

Thanks for taking our family pictures and for not moving to California

And for always carrying a gun

Dad

This year at the beach was big for me. I was not on drugs, I was happy and I was released from probation. It made me grateful for my family. It made me thankful for my dad.

I love my dad

Family

I have always kind of been on the outside

I think that is changing........

Little Miss

I got to spend a whole week with this little wonder. I love her.......

Even if she likes Hannah Montana

Ed

That says is all

Free at last, Free at last.....

There was not a camera around when the news broke

I AM OFF PROBATION

But let me assure you...this is the face I was making

When a Boy Gets Your Camera II

Disneyland

Went to Disneyland. It was awesome. I......

• Ate 675 Churros.....one was great
• Saw a crazy lady dance at a churro cart
• Ate some Micky Mouse pancake
• had 1265 Diet Cokes
• Looked at 67 hoodies
• Got wet
• Got a piggy back ride
• Crossed a busy street
• Cried 4563 times (out of joy)
• Rode Tower of Terror...twice
• Watched fireworks
• Laughed 6987 times